


Know no fear, I'll still be here tomorrow

by CaptainAwesome242



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Boys Kissing, Hand Jobs, Insecurity, Kissing, Late Night Conversations, Late at Night, Loneliness, M/M, Music, Singing, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-06
Updated: 2018-02-06
Packaged: 2019-03-14 19:16:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13596606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainAwesome242/pseuds/CaptainAwesome242
Summary: Jim's feeling lonely, Leonard makes sure he knows he's not alone





	Know no fear, I'll still be here tomorrow

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RainbowRandomness](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowRandomness/gifts).



> Title taken from “Heaven from Here” by Robbie Williams, which I feel sums up the sentiment of this fic quite well

It was late at night when the noise woke Leonard from his sleep. 

It wasn’t especially loud or chaotic like something breaking so he didn’t immediately leap out of bed, choosing instead to lie still and strain his ears to identify the sound. After a moment he decided it wasn’t anything sinister, sounding more controlled and musical, and he rolled over to ask Jim if he’d left the radio on. 

Only Jim wasn’t there.

Leonard frowned and eased himself out of bed, stopping only to pull a t-shirt over his head before quietly padding towards the door. He’d barely stepped into the living room before he pulled back into the shadows, hoping he hadn’t been seen. 

Perched on the edge of the couch with his guitar resting on his pyjama-clad legs was Jim, strumming along to the song he was singing. Had it just been one of his casual jamming sessions Leonard would have made his presence known and asked what the hell he was doing playing music at three in the morning, but there was something very different about the way he was playing that night. The atmosphere was sombre, and the same soft light that made Jim’s golden hair glow cast deeper shadows in his already furrowed brow, making him look pained and lost.

 

_“I walk this empty street_

_On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams_

_Where the city sleeps_

_And I'm the only one and I walk alone”_

 

If the lyrics weren’t enough to make Leonard’s breath catch then the raw emotion in his boyfriend’s voice was. He meant what he was singing, and he was singing about loneliness. Oh god.

 

_“My shadow's the only one that walks beside me_

_My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating_

_Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me_

_'Til then I walk alone”_

 

Jim’s fingers moved deftly about the strings, each new note breaking Leonard’s heart just that little bit more as he wondered what he’d done - or not done - to make Jim feel this way. They’d both been anxious entering into the relationship, both having been burnt before and neither knowing how it would affect their working relationship but everything had been good so far. Or so Leonard had thought, Jim obviously felt otherwise.

 

_“Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah, aaah-ah_

_Ah-ah, ah-ah_

 

_I walk alone_

_I walk a...”_

 

Even as Leonard struggled with his emotions he couldn’t help but note how beautiful Jim’s voice was - it was rich and deep with a slight husk, and each note was held perfectly. It was an old song, very old, but Leonard doubted he’d ever forget it now given the way it was etching itself in his brain.

 

_I walk this empty street_

_On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams_

_Where the city sleeps_

_And I'm the only one and I walk a..._

 

_My shadow's the only one that walks beside me_

_My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating_

_Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me_

_'Til then I walk alone...”_

 

Jim’s voice faded out as he strummed the last few chords, and eventually silence rang out through the room. He heaved a dejected sigh and stared forlornly into nothingness, the brilliant blue of his eyes dimmed by the surrounding rings of darkness. 

Leonard hardly dared to breathe but something gave him away as Jim’s head snapped up, the startled look falling into a sheepish grimace as he recognised the figure in the doorway.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you. Guess I was playing louder than I thought,”

Leonard, not yet trusting his voice, only nodded. Jim’s face fell.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated quietly, “you can go back to bed, I promise I’ll be quieter,”

Shaking his head, Leonard finally entered the room, “No, I... I think we need to talk first,”

Jim sighed, frowning slightly as Leonard sat gingerly at the other end of the couch, “I’m fine, Bones, really, it’s just... this time of year gets to me sometimes,”

That hadn’t been what Leonard had expected to hear at all and his brows come together in confusion. He stayed silent, waiting for Jim to continue, which he did after a short pause to gather his thoughts.

“Tomorrow... well, I guess it’s today now,” he corrected looking at the time, “is my brother’s birthday. I haven’t seen him in seventeen years, Bones, he... he just left. He packed his things and walked out and... and I don’t blame him but... it hurt. He was the only one I could count on and... and then he was gone,”

Leonard sat in silence, allowing Jim to pour his heart out to him.

“It’s not like I’m a stranger to absent family members, you know? My dad wasn’t there, my mom was _barely_ there... Sam was the only one I could rely on and he left me alone. Growing up, it seemed to be a trend in my life that people I needed left me. First my dad died before I could meet him; then Sam; as I got older my mom stopped coming home as often. Pike was like a father figure to me until... until he died.”

Jim took a shuddering breath and ran a hand roughly through his hair, making the ends stick up in all directions, “I just... this time of year... Sam’s birthday... it just makes me think of all the people who should have been there but weren’t... for whatever reasons. It just makes me feel a little alone, like maybe I’m not worth anyone’s time,”

Though the last words were barely audible they hit Leonard the hardest. His Jim, his beautiful spark of a human being thought he didn’t deserve good people in his life based on events that had been out of his control. It made his blood boil in anger at the world and sympathy for the poor man who was constantly being made to suffer at the hands of the universe. He’d been about to comfort his love but Jim spoke first.

“But now, now I have you Bones and I love you _so much_. God, I love you so much it hurts. I don’t feel alone when I’m with you but times like this... when I’m reminded of everyone who’s gone I... I can’t help be terrified of what’s going to happen to us. Especially in our line of work I just... I worry that the same thing that’s happened my whole life is gonna happen again but to you and... I just can’t bear the thought of you being gone,”

Jim’s breath hitched and tears welled in his eyes as he finished, his shoulders shaking with suppressed sobs. Leonard took his hand and squeezed it tight.

“Jim, look at me,” he waiting until Jim’s eyes were locked on his before putting as much conviction in his voice as he could muster, “I’m not going anywhere,”

“You can’t promise that,” Jim whispered, a tear rolling off his cheek and splashing on his bare chest.

“The hell I can’t. I know things haven’t been easy for you and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. But from now on the only time I’m ever going to leave you is to go to bathroom, and even then you can join me if you want. I know with our work it’s difficult to promise forever, but I’ll be damned if I’m going down without a fight. Hell, I dragged you back to life so I wouldn’t have to live without you so you can forget it if you think you’re getting away from me that easy. And I want you to know that however alone you feel, I’m always here for you, always. No matter what happens, you’re never gonna be alone again. I love you, Jim. Always have, always will.”

Jim eyes were wide and shiny as he stared at Leonard, and dancing in the corners was a touch of hope, “Do you really mean that?”

Leonard nodded but he knew he needed to do more to convey his feelings to Jim. He’d never been especially good with words, well, not his own anyway, but as he glanced to the guitar in Jim’s lap he had his answer. Jim was a musical prodigy, a virtuoso, if there was one thing he wouldn’t miss the meaning of it was song.

Leonard cleared his throat and began to sing, quietly and wobbly at first but his voice soon grew in strength and clarity.

 

_"Wise men say_

_Only fools rush in_

_But I can't help falling in love with you”_

 

It was an old song, older still than the song Jim had been singing earlier, but the younger man still recognised it and began to strum along.

 

_“Shall I stay?_

_Would it be a sin_

_If I can't help falling in love with you?”_

 

Although Leonard was slightly out of time Jim kept pace with him effortlessly, staring in awe at the man before him.

 

_“Like a river flows_

_Surely to the sea_

_Darlin’, so it goes_

_Some things are meant to be_

_Take my hand,_

_Take my whole life, too_

_For I can't help falling in love with you”_

 

Just as before the words and melody petered out, leaving the occupants of the room in a hushed silence. Leonard had watched Jim carefully throughout the song and felt his heart swell with relief that the other man seemed to have gotten the message. 

They sat staring at each other for a moment longer before, without taking his eyes from Leonard’s, Jim gently shoved his guitar to the ground before closing the gap between them, lips locking passionately. 

The older man responded in kind as Jim gripped one hand in his hair and the other balled the fabric of Leonard’s shirt in a vice-like grip, desperately holding him closer. Leonard’s own hands were gliding effortlessly over Jim’s bare back as he probed with his tongue in a wordless request to deepen the kiss. 

A request that was quickly granted.

The kiss was broken for a moment, just long enough for Jim to pull Leonard’s shirt over his head before his lips crashed roughly against Leonard’s once again. Leonard moaned and shivered with pleasure as Jim’s hands ran greedily over his bare torso before planting themselves on his shoulders and pushing him until he was lying down with Jim leaning over him, his knees either side of Leonard’s hips. 

From this position it was easier to see the growing erection Jim’s baggy pyjama shorts were doing nothing to hide. Leonard reached down and squeezed him through the fabric, making Jim moan against Leonard’s lips and almost collapse on top of him. Jim responded by rocking his hips and grinding against Leonard’s own bulging cock, eliciting a garbled moan as he began pumping Jim’s dick in his hand. 

Awkwardly balancing on one knee and then the other Jim shucked his shorts off, leaving him completely exposed and at the mercy of the doctor who wasted no time in getting back to where he left off. Jim closed his eyes groaned in pleasure at the skin on skin contact as Leonard skilfully alternated between squeezing and running his hand up and down Jim’s length, bringing him to full hardness. Jim’s hips twitched in response pushing himself closer to Leonard’s hands, one of which worked his cock while the other was braced against Jim’s hip. 

It wasn’t long before Jim convulsed in euphoria, panting to catch his breath as his wetness smeared over Leonard’s hands. He fell forward, hands landing either side of Leonard’s head as he hovered inches away from Leonard’s smirking face.

“Still feel like you’re not worth anyone’s time?” His breath tickled Jim’s nose as he spoke.

“I don’t know Bones, you make a pretty convincing argument,” Jim croaked, breath hitching before he flashed his teeth in a way that made Leonard’s toes curl, “now let me show you my thanks,”

Jim leant down to capture Leonard’s lips briefly, using his teeth to tug playfully on Leonard’s bottom lip before trailing kisses down his sculpted torso, lingering teasingly at the waistband of his pyjama pants. 

“Jim,” Leonard complained, his voice rough with desire.

Jim smiled mischievously as he hooked his fingers under the waistband and shimmied the pants down to Leonard’s knees, freeing his erection from the restrictive clothing. Jim took a second to lick his dry lips before his mouth was back on Leonard’s skin, kissing his way up the length of his cock before letting his tongue take over. Leonard shuddered and arched his back as Jim’s tongue worked furiously, gasping breathlessly as it focussed it’s attentions on his sensitive tip. 

Leonard could feel he was close, and his fingers groped desperately at the leather of the couch as he tried to ground himself, Jim making him light-headed and dizzy as he took him into his mouth. 

It wasn’t long before Leonard achieved orgasm too, and the pair of them were lying together, panting, sweating, naked, and happy.

Leonard planted a tender kiss on the hair slicked to Jim’s forehead, “If you ever feel down like that again let me know okay? I don’t want you singing sad songs in the middle of the night,”

“I will, but if we do this every time I sing a sad song I’d better brush up on the blues,” Jim grinned at Leonard cheekily from his position resting on the other’s shoulder.

Leonard rolled his eyes but he smiled, “I’d rather hear you sing happy songs, you’re voice is too beautiful to sing sad songs,”

Jim blushed scarlet, “I’m not that good. But what about you? I’ve never heard you sing before it was amazing!”

Leonard snorted, “Yeah right, there’s a reason I don’t sing - you sound like a nightingale and I sound like a strangled seagull,”

“I’m serious!” Jim responded, laughing heartily at the comparison, “your singing voice is sexy as fuck, Bones,”

“Whatever you say Jim,” Leonard scoffed, voice laced with skepticism.

“Bones,” Jim propped himself up to look Leonard in the face, “do you really think I would have jumped you like that if I thought you sounded anything less than angelic?”

“Angelic!?” Leonard’s eyes widened in incredulity, “I’m setting you up a hearing check first thing tomorrow,"

Jim laughed in disbelief, “I can’t believe you don’t hear it! You’re wasted as a doctor, you should have been a singer,” 

“I think I’ll leave the singing to you,”

Jim pouted, “But I wanna hear you sing,”

Leonard leaned over and kissed the pout off of Jim’s face, “Maybe some other time, but I certainly won’t be giving up my career for the opera any time soon,”

“I don’t know, Bones, I reckon you’d look amazing in a powdered wig,”

They went back and forth this way until the sun came up but Leonard didn’t care - Jim was happy and assured of Leonard’s love, and that was all that mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> Wow.
> 
> I meant to write this as an angsty fic where Jim sings, then Bones sings, they kiss, the end. But as I wrote it the sexual stuff kind of followed naturally, I hope it works!
> 
> Inspiration from a number of songs:  
> Boulevard of Broken Dreams - Green Day  
> I Can't Help Falling In Love With You - Elvis  
> Heaven From Here - Robbie Williams
> 
> and the prompts:  
> "But I want to hear you sing"  
> And  
> “Loneliness”
> 
> and of course Chris Pine's singing and guitar playing abilities ;)
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed, let me know!


End file.
